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Dating advice · Matchfinder archive

Be Treated Like A Lady

Published · 4 min read

From the Matchfinder archive. References to site features and some advice may reflect an earlier version of the service. Read our current safety guidance.

I am not that old, but I have to admit that in some ways I am more of an “old soul.” I have a penchant for old films, music from the sixties and fashions for yester-year. The truth of the matter is that I would like to some things back in fashion again, such as respecting elders, good manners, and good old-fashioned chivalry.

It’s nice of course that womankind has been fully emancipated and that we continue to stake an evermore significant claim in the world. That being said however, I still long for the days when men held doors open for women, let us pass through first, and surrendered their seats to women who had to stand.

It’s a great shame that many men have lost that high regard they had for women. The truth is that we’re just the same. More independent maybe, but we are still the feminine species, and when a man acknowledges that with acts of simple chivalry, it really makes a difference.

Why should women still get this special treatment?

It says so in the Bible Remember that we carry life in our wombs We are often the solid backbone of the family We love to help We abhor discrimination Not forgetting too that we have to put-up with raging hormones, not to mention PMS!

Nothing says it better than the words penned by James Brown, "This is a man’s world, but it ain’t nothin’ without a woman or a girl".

However, when all is said and done, it’s not just the guys who are at fault; us ladies have to shoulder some of the blame too. The fact of the matter is that on certain minor issues, some women make mountains out of molehills. They mix up being strong with being argumentative. They try to control relationships, and they sometimes have foul mouths on them. It’s hardly surprising that unladylike like behavior results in unladylike treatment.

If you agree with my sentiments, here are seven simple ways we can foster that spirit if chivalry.

Chivalry promotion tactic 1 - Behave like a lady

Don’t use the “B’ WORD! It doesn’t do our image any good at all. Also, don’t act the fool in public. Smart is good – silly is daft. As the old saying goes: honey attract flies better than vinegar.

Chivalry promotion tactic 2 – Let him do the chasing

There is nothing less endearing than a woman chasing after a man. Do that and you’ll never experience the delights of being courted properly. It’s a treat not to be missed.

Chivalry promotion tactic 3: Teach your children

Today’s youngsters are not great at interpersonal relationships. Whether it’s the rap/hip-hop set, the lowering of values, or simply bad role modeling. Young people today couldn’t be further away from being chivalrous. It’s time we put a stop to it.

Mums shouldn’t tell their girls porkpies just to bolster their son’s chances, or to back them up when they are in the wrong. And mums must teach their daughters to show discretion, to be discerning and to respect themselves. Dads must lead by example – a chivalrous example of course!

Chivalry promotion tactic 4: Don’t put it about

You know what I mean by it. Yes, your body – sex. Guys don’t respect girls who don’t respect themselves. If you want him to respect you, give him something to respect.

Chivalry promotion tactic 5: Stick to your values

Its one thing having high values when it suits you, but quite another when you let them lapse in certain situations. Having high principles is no good if you don’t stick to them. If you don’t like the way a guy is acting or treating you – let him know.

Chivalry promotion tactic 6: Don’t talk about previous relationships

You should not talk about previous relationships. It never does any good. Saying how well a previous boyfriend treated you only indicates you must have done something wrong if you’re no still together.

Saying how badly a previous boyfriend treated you makes it sound like you might have encouraged it. Just concentrate on the now and getting him to treat you as you expect - with chivalry.

Chivalry promotion tactic 7: Don’t be mean

If a man buys you a gift that is not to your liking, don’t pout. Just accept it with good grace. You can always discretely drop something into later conversations to correct any misapprehensions.

By following these seven top tips on promoting chivalry, you’re sure to find your knight in shining armour.

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