Surviving a Bad Setup
Many have had bad online dating experiences. You have to take the bad with the good. The goal is to meet a great person and start a lifelong relationship. But some are not that lucky.
Not too long ago, I cancelled my online dating memberships because of consistent bad dating experiences. What happened next? Everyone I knew had someone nice they wanted me to meet. I don’t like to disappoint people. So, I didn’t see anything wrong with going on a few blind dates.
A blind date can be very risky. Your friend or relative believes they’ve found the perfect date for you. But ask yourself, “Does my friend know me well enough to play matchmaker”?
Take the following things into consideration before agreeing to a blind date. They are ways to ensure the date is a good one. Not only do you want the date to be a successful one, but you don’t want to ruin your relationship with the matchmaker.
Explain What You’re Looking for in a New Date
Yes, your friend or relative wants you to date the perfect person, but sometimes they can get it all wrong. Thus, help the matchmaker by describing a few of the things you’re looking for in a date. Tell them what you like and dislike. Maybe you want to meet a humorous, religious or family oriented person. Or you don’t want to date a smoker or drinker.
Unfortunately, it may be impossible to avoid going on a date if your mom or favorite aunt is the matchmaker. Just make the most of the date by being gracious and hoping the date goes well. You might like the person more than expected.
Be Open Minded
Do you really know what type of person you’re looking for? You may describe a specific type of person, but your friends and family may think you need another type. For example, you may like long haired rockers, but they always seem to mistreat you. But your friend wants to introduce you to a conservative who wears a tie every day. Be open minded. You might like this person’s sense of humor or quirky side.
Converse with Your Date in Advance
Everyone is nervous on a blind date. Increase your comfort level by talking to your date in advance. They will probably feel just as nervous as you do and welcome the chance to talk before the date.
Meet with a Group of Friends
If someone is trying to set up a blind date for you, meet this new person via during a group date. Hopefully, this will help the two of you to get over your nervousness. You can get to know each other, but if there isn’t any chemistry, there are still others to talk to.
Make reservations at the newest restaurant in town. Chances are many people in your group have never dined there before. You could also plan a group activity night at a bowling alley or arcade where everyone can dine, play games and have fun.
If you like your new date, this is a wonderful thing. Make sure you let the matchmaker know that they made a great choice. But if you don’t like this person, tell the matchmaker the bad news. You shouldn’t feel obligated to see the person just to spare the matchmaker’s feelings.
Also, let your date know how you feel. Even if you go on a few dates together and don’t feel a spark, it’s time to tell your date how you feel and move on. You don’t want to lead this person on any longer than necessary. Not only will your matchmaker appreciate your honesty, but also your date.
Don’t Hold a Grudge
Don’t blame your matchmaking friend or relative for the outcome of the date. There is no need to hold a grudge. After all, it wasn’t the matchmaker’s fault that there wasn’t any chemistry between you and your date. The matchmaker wanted things to go well, but that wasn’t the case.
Remember this person is only looking out for your best interests. They honestly thought that you and this person would really like each other. So, don’t automatically turn them down if they want to set you up with someone else in the future. Who knows? Maybe the second, third, fourth or even fifth blind date might be the love of your life.