Real Love or Just Infatuation?

Your notebook is filled with little hearts, and his name is practically on every page. You’re actually planning your future together. As a matter of fact, you’ve dreamt about how many kids you’ll have together. You’ve selected baby names for both little girls and boys. You know practically everything about him such as the type of car that he drives and the style of shirts he likes to wear. The only thing is that he doesn’t know that you’re alive.

This is a true example of being in a state of infatuation.

Infatuation means that you have a serious crush on another person. Some people might think that they are in love. When the feeling wanes, they move on to a new relationship. Nothing is wrong with being infatuated, but it shouldn’t last a long time. It should be temporary, and it should not be a condition. If you are infatuated for a longer period, it could have a negative impact on your life.

How can you tell if you are stuck in a state of infatuation?

- You consistently crave to be with the person
- You go through the day with both good and bad feelings. It depends on whether or not the person you desire has the same type of feelings towards you.
- You are constantly daydreaming about this person.
- You feel a pang when he is not around you.
- You don’t feel complete when he is not around you.
- You want him to constantly reassure you.
- You revolve your whole life around him. You might even change your routine to accommodate him.
- You are scared that he will one day reject or abandon you.
- You want him to feel the same way about you.

If you’ve experienced these types of feelings, you know that there are basically two ways to resolve them. First, you can tell him how you feel and hope that he feels the same way. Secondly, you can keep your feelings inside, suffer in silence and try to avoid him in the future.

There’s no shame in being in a state of infatuation, so don’t worry.

You’ll experience feelings that most people will never experience. You’ll make the guy feel really special because some men are flattered when a woman is infatuated with them. Since you are genuinely attracted to the guy, he’ll enjoy your company. But you may date plenty of guys, hoping to always maintain the feeling that you get when you’re in a state of infatuation. Don’t allow yourself to fall into this trap. The goal is to enter into a relationship that is built upon mutual love and respect.

When the infatuation starts to die down, your emotions will change. It might feel as if you aren’t in love anymore. This is not the case. You were never in love. You were in a state of infatuation. Hopefully, you will determine if you and the guy actually have something in common. If so, you can now build something long lasting. It makes sense to build a solid relationship based upon love instead of infatuation.

If you feel that you’re stuck in a state of infatuation, don’t forget the following:

- Infatuation is not a condition, so it should only be temporary.
- Move on. If he knows that you are available, but he does not ask you out, then he probably isn’t interested. This may be hard to accept, but this is the case about 90 percent of the time.
- Infatuation may seem fun, but your goal is to find long lasting love.
- Infatuation can help you see clearly. Once you get to see what this guy is really like, you may not like him as much. Or it could also make you courageous enough to make him notice you.
- Don’t behave in a manner that you’ll regret later. You may plan to do anything to get his attention. But don’t forget that men don’t like easy women. They want a challenge. Most likely, if you are too available, he won’t be interested in you.

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